Baby Monitor, $15

Monday, 12:03 PM

Riley: hey! is the baby monitor still available?

Damian: Yeah. $15, I'll leave it in the lobby on top of the mailboxes.

2:52 PM

Riley: picked it up 🙂 hey, why are you selling it so cheap? it looks brand new

Damian: Because I don't need it anymore.

Tuesday, 2:48 AM

Riley: Damian, sorry for the hour. Does the unit have any recordings stored on it?

Riley: I woke up and I can hear a woman counting

Riley: one, two, three, and then a door opening, and it repeats every twenty minutes on the dot

Riley: I unplugged it and took the batteries out and I can still hear it just as clearly

Damian: It's not a recording.

Damian: Bring it back. I'll give you your $15 back plus another $200 for your trouble.

Riley: Two hundred bucks for a $15 gadget?

Damian: Are you home alone?

Riley: yeah, Kyle, my husband, is on the night shift until seven. And I'm eight months pregnant, so tell me what this is

Damian: I didn't know that.

Damian: Did you say anything out loud in the same room as the monitor?

Riley: I said "shit" when I woke up, I don't know. what kind of question is that?

Damian: Did you say your name?

Riley: no. why would I say my name out loud if I'm home alone?

Riley: look, I'm taking it down to the dumpster and going back to bed. Four flights of stairs with no elevator, but I'm doing it

Damian: Don't go outside.

Riley: I'm telling you out of courtesy, I'm not asking for permission

3:14 AM